A lot of people see Melania Trump as a victim. I don’t think anyone who reads a picture book to sick children in a hospital without showing them the pictures can be a victim.
I really do want to like Melania. I just can’t bring myself to do it. She is a fashion plate whose personality, sense of style and priorities can be described as a combination of Martha Stewart, Miranda Priestly and Maleficent under electroshock treatment.
As a former English as a second language teacher, I find her campaign “Be Best” infuriating. The title of her campaign ignores basic grammatical rules so blatantly the campaign should be called, “Fuck It”.
Recently she has unveiled ominous rows of cranberry Christmas trees in the White House. It looks like Christmas at True Blood’s vampire bar Fangtasia. I’m guessing Melania decided to do something radically different from the Chronicles of Narnia spooky White Witch Christmas trees she chose last year and has gloriously, spectacularly failed. If Melania’s decorations over the past two years tell us anything about her it’s that she is cold, so cold icebergs may just stop melting.
The more Melania is in the spotlight, the more I am convinced we are watching the origin story of a new, not so Disney villain play out in real time. The mental gymnastics it takes to be married to Donald Trump must take it’s toll. If she ends up falling out of a White House window and being brought back to life by a stray cat, I will not be surprised.
I’m Spring Day (real name, hippie parents)
Moving back to the United States after having lived in Japan and traveling the world for 16 years has been a bit of a head fuck, especially since I now work in the U.K. My blog “The United States of Shock!” is where I give my brilliant and bitter two cents, pence, yen and euro on my experience with culture shock and current events. If you have any questions you would like to have answered in a snit, email them to email@example.com